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Uncle Crappy

words. pictures. beer.

I generally maintain that there is no actual end to Ohio State football season, but after our last on-field performance, it was probably good to take a small break, just to let some of that bad mojo slip away. Our family didn’t even make our usual fuss over the spring game this year, as we were all in Florida for Father of Uncle Crappy’s Birthday.

Rest period is over boys and girls — Uncle Crappy has purchased his first college football preview magazines of the season.

I made the regular purchase of the Sporting News preview book, usually well-written and pretty thorough. I also bought a copy of Phil Steele’s preview, a massive volume with 300-plus pages of freaking agate — but full of more information than most of the other previews combined.

That’s an interesting magazine. Graphically, it’s a nightmare — tiny type, jumbles of boxes and charts and thumbnail photos scattered everywhere. Mr. Steele, who writes all the copy himself (as he points out in several locations) could also benefit from a little thorough editing — like, say, he could cut out all the references to himself and how accurate his book is and probably cut the number of trees he kills each year in half.

But, jesus, it is thorough. I’ll be reading from now until September 1, and I won’t come close to getting through the whole goddamn thing. And that’ll be OK, because that’s the day we get started for real.

(That is, if you consider the game against DI-AA Youngstown State to be a real game. But we’ll save those thoughts for later.)

Both magazines peg Ohio State as a Big Ten contender, but not a serious one (TSN has us 17th in the country and finishing 4th in the conference, while Phil says we’re 15th and will finish 3rd in the Big Ten.). On the other hand, both say if we manage to win the big road games (Penn State and Michigan) we should be in an interesting position at the end of the year. They say we’re going to have a killer defense, good kicking game, a solid o-line, good skill players and a steady, dependable quarterback who won’t dazzle anyone but should keep us out of trouble.

Think back five years or so. Does this sound familiar?

Look, it’s waaaay too early for me to be sayin’ anything.

But I’m just sayin.’

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