i’m sorry, so sorry

1. Apologies to Google. Uncle Crappy keeps popping up and dropping off because of my inability to post regularly.

2. Apologies to The Wife. Thanks to a total loss of ability to correctly pick NFL games (not that I ever would have called it a talent), I’m not even coming close to being competitive in the annual football bet. We pick winners, straight up, of all pro games and all Top 25 college games, all the way through the Super Bowl, with a correct pick being worth a point. The loser takes the winner out to dinner at the restaurant of the winner’s choice. I’m already 20 points down. I mean, she usually beats me anyway, but this year the bet’s going to be over before the Michigan game, for crying out loud.

3. Apologies to anyone who reads this and has noticed a lack of nifty typeface features, links or the previously promised cat pictures. See, when the computer folks at work decided that anything having to do with Blogger was “chat” — and, of course, “chat” is bad — I’ve been posting — occasionally — from home, on my tired old iMac. The Bondi Beast needs some help — a memory upgrade, OSX, a supplemental hard drive and a CD burner, to start with. As it is, I’m lucky to be able to find a browser that is both A) compatible with my machine and B) supported by Blogger. And until I get OSX, it appears that cat pictures on Uncle Crappy are out of the question. I’m also sorry that I can no longer find a spell-checker — I can’t access Blogger’s, and the one on my machine vanished years ago. Mind you, I’m not necessarily apologizing for that — I’m just sorry as hell that I keep having to look stuff up in the dictionary.

4. Apologies to the cat (see above). I promised I’d make him famous. He got an agent and everything…

5. Apologies to anyone who has reached Uncle Crappy after searching for stuff about a radio show that goes by the name of Schnit. I had no idea such a thing existed (the show, dumbass, not the radio…). My schnit came from a two-year-old Simpsons desk calendar.

6. And apologies to the author of California Bloggin’, found at http://www.todaysissues.net/words/ (Yes, that should be a link. See No. 3) I noticed a while back that Uncle Crappy had been added to her list of reads. I was flattered. I noticed today that apparetly I’ve fallen out of favor. Uncle Crappy is still on the list, sort of. Anne left the link there, but CROSSED IT OUT (I’d demonstrate, but again, I refer you to No. 3). Um, Anne? What did I do? Do I offend? I try to be a nice guy. I enjoyed your “100 things about me” list, except that I hate peas and I’ve never much cared for the Bills, although I live not too far from Jim Kelly’s hometown (East Brady, Pa., as you probably already know.) And I honestly admire anyone who actually can sit down and complete the “100 things about me” list — I’ve tried like three times and have never been able to finish. And jeez, you’ve been doing this regularly for almost three years now. Making regular posts for that long is an accomplishment in itself. Maybe I’ve breached some kind of blogging etiquette? Maybe you just think I’m a moron? You wouldn’t be the first to draw that conclusion. Whatever it is, please, let me know. How do I get back on the list? Anne? Can Uncle Crappy come back?