the good old days.

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Fall used to be a lot busier than it is these days.

For most of the last two decades, about half of our fall weekends were spent driving to Columbus, prepping a tailgate party for somewhere between 10 and 20 people, going to Ohio State’s home game and then coming home on Sunday. For several of those years, we would get home just in time for me to turn around and drive to work for my regular Sunday night shift.

It was a blast. And even when we were in our early forties, it was exhausting. And now that it’s ten years later? It would be impossible.

For me, there was a turning point a few years ago, with a game against, I think, a directional Florida. It was early September and stinking hot, as Columbus can be. It also rained all the way through tailgate “party,” which mostly consisted of us huddled under a canopy, eating soggy food and trying keep rain out of our beers. And when the rain ended, it didn’t help — it just made it feel even more humid.

There was talk among the adults initially — even in my mid-40s at that point, I am not one of the adults — and several decided they were going to do the comfortable thing: Go home and watch on TV. At that point, I was pretty hardcore — even leaving the game early was something you just did not do; skipping a game entirely was out of the question.

But once the sweat became so profuse that I could feel it running down my back, I started listening: Air conditioning. Cold beer. No lines for food or bathrooms. A 70-inch television, comfortable chairs and no danger (well, not much) that someone would dump a gallon of Diet Coke down my back.

OK. I relented. And it was awfully nice.

With the exception of the mostly-annual big deal non-conference game or the home opener, the September games were the first to go. They generally didn’t mean much, and Columbus can be as hot in September as it is in July.

Next, we started paring back on the not-as-big-deal Big Ten games. You know the ones — they would be historic upsets if they happened (and they occasionally did), and who wants to brag about watching Illinois upsetting Ohio State in Cbus in 2007?

(Spoiler alert: We were there. BUT I’M NOT BRAGGING.)

Once my folks made the decision to stop going to games, this became a bit easier. We had one season, two years ago, when we had four seats together, and four of us made it to a few games that season together — and they were awesome. But there were only a couple of them, and realistically, it was too much of a chore for my folks to get into the stadium, deal with the crowd and still be able to enjoy — or even see — the game.

I’m not at all suggesting that they are responsible for this change. It was part of it, but we’re getting old too. And when we were able to do a full weekend, we were exhausted by the time we got home on Sunday.

So we don’t do it. And life is better. We did four home games last year, and we’re about to go to our second of four this season. Mom and dad still love the tailgate parties — so do we — and we’ll have four good ones in 2019. They go home and watch on TV, and we go inside the Shoe and see some college football that many fans would kill to see live.

I haven’t made too many concessions to my 52-year-old self yet, but this one has been good. And I still get to see Michigan State, Wisconsin and Penn State, have great tailgate parties with the Killer Nuts Tailgating group that’s been doing this for 20 years — and I don’t feel like I’m doing to die by the time December begins.

 

a day.

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This is the only photo I took during the day today. (And Mrs. Crappy won’t be happy to see this one.)

It wasn’t for a lack of opportunities. On the surface, this was an amazing day, mostly because Mrs. Crappy had a rare Sunday off and I was able to spend the entire day with her: outdoor yoga, outdoor lunch, pool time and a party on the Mon Wharf with friends, cold beer and a few of our favorite food trucks.

But life is rarely that simple, right?

I know I’m not the only person who got really angry yesterday as I took in everything that happened in Virginia (I’m confident that I’m not betraying any standards of journalism ethics when I say I find white supremacists of any variety abhorrent). And although Mrs. Crappy and I had a terrific night by a backyard campfire last night, I woke up under the same dark clouds I allowed to build the day before.

And when I let those clouds to gather, they tend to hang around. I can’t say my shitty mood this morning was responsible for everything that happened today, but I think it’s probably tough to separate all of these things from the negative energy I was oozing this morning:

  • Charlie knocking over a giant cup of cold brew coffee — full of sticky half and half — on the living room floor.
  • Noticing a mouse that seemed to be in distress lying in our driveway.
  • Noticing that the mouse had died in the same spot by the time we returned.
  • Sort of losing my wallet as we tried to depart for the pool.
  • Mrs. Crappy getting stung on the toe by a bee as we walked back to our umbrella after our first dip in the pool.

Was any of this a direct consequence of my shitty mood this morning? No. But:

Ashley, one of my two favorite yoga teachers, has been touching on the four yamas in the last month; they’re at the start of Patanjali’s eight limbs of the broader Yoga, and they serve as a guide for ethical conduct for those following the yogic path. The fourth yama is Brahmacharya, literally, behavior that leads to Brahman, or the highest divinity. Patanjali’s definition of Brahmacharya is pretty narrow and pretty specific to his time: Celibacy.

Yes, that’s since been reinterpreted. Ashley has talked about tailoring our actions towards the divine — definitely a goal worth pursuing. But an interpretation that is perhaps more accessible is this: The right use of energy.

And wow, that goes a long way towards explaining how today unfolded. I am a news guy; I was that way before I chose this as a profession. I’ll never be able to step away completely from what I see, read and cover — it’s part of who I am, and it always will be. And this weekend was tough. I’m a veteran and I think I’m pretty patriotic … and seeing this garbage happen in my country is deeply offensive, to the point where it feels like a physical wound.

But here’s the thing: it feels that way because I let it feel that way. When something like this happens — and, I’m afraid, it’s going to happen a lot in the next couple years — I’m always going to feel the way I felt this weekend, at least initially. After that impulse, though, I can control my reaction … and I didn’t do that today.

Not at first, anyway. When Kelly got stung, she shouted — and that sort of snapped me out of all of the other crap that had been cluttering my brain all day. We got her some ice (thanks to the kids at the Avonworth pool for their help) and pretty quickly she felt better enough to take a nap in the warm, late afternoon sun.

I knew later that my mental clouds had passed, when I realized that I had to walk back to my car to grab my regular glasses that I forgot to bring to the wharf party. If I’m in a bad mood, that’s the kind of dumb little thing that can spoil a day for me; this afternoon, it did not. I recognized that I was in a cool space, among friends, and the walk back to the parking garage was insignificant.

I need to find that more, because that’s the right use of energy.

I’m now at home. I’ve had a stunning bottle of beer.

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I’ve hung out a bit with my cat.

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And, thankfully, I didn’t let at shitty start to the day — and all of the weirdness that followed — get in the way of a great Sunday.

above and beyond.

First, let’s make sure you’ve all seen this comment, left by Tenth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge (Brought to you by Bocktown) winner Kewyson on the previous post:

Now, on to my wish (I thought I’d get three) – I propose, assuming UC is okay with this, that he organizes a social gathering at Bocktown – all participants are welcome – and I will donate my hard earned winnings to whatever $50 buys. All I ask is that I be remembered and idolized at the event (and since I’ve not personally met most of you – you can pick any idol and pretend).

How does that sound UC?

In short, Kewyson, it sounds awesome, and I really appreciate your generosity. Here’s what we’ll do: when the weather gets warm enough for our friends at Bocktown Robinson to open their back porch, we’ll do a Friday night happy hour, and we’ll use our $50 prize to buy drafts for any TAUCNFFC contestants who can show up. There will be plenty of notice, so we can get as many people as possible out to Bocktown on the chosen evening.

And as far as idolizing Kewyson goes, it’s not a bad idea; he is, in fact, the only person I know who actually speaks writes in tongues.

you. yes, you.

If you and I have:

  • Had a beer
  • Watched hockey
  • Attended a tailgate party
  • Cooked for each other
  • Jumped in the Mon
  • Gotten sloppy over sangria
  • Gone out for dinner
  • Raved about music
  • Choked down a 649
  • Traded soup
  • Met for lunch
  • Sat around a campfire
  • Seen a concert
  • Talked on Twitter, by text or even on the damn telephone
  • Played softball
  • Gone running
  • Traded blog comments
  • Cheered each other’s successes
  • Helped each other up when things weren’t so good
  • Smiled, laughed or cried
  • Been there for each other, even in seemingly insignificant ways

in the last year, I so am thankful to have you in my life.

Happy Thanksgiving, y’all.

11. happy…

I had the pleasure of spending Birthday Eve at Bocktown Monaca with Chris and John. We hadn’t really set out to do a birthday kind of anything; rather, we had tried to find an occasion to open this:

That’s a 2009 Dark Lord from Three Floyds. Chris mentioned offhand a while back that she had a b0ttle and said she’d be happy to share it with me when the time was right. There have been a couple chance when we could have cracked it, but in the end, we came up with this — at some point after the B2 hoopla had calmed a bit, it would be a nice way to mark the occasion. The fact that that moment came the night before my birthday was a nice bonus.

Chris bought dinner. The appetizers — mussels with andouille on one hand, grilled scallops with a kiwi salsa on the other — were delicious. The Bocktown burger was sloppy and spectacular — just as I like it.

But the beer — and the fact that we shared not only the Dark Lord but also a bottle of Three Floyds’ Arctic Panzer Wolf and a beautiful home-brewed saison — made the night. I am so grateful to have friends who would not just think of me when they come across a special bottle but also wait nearly two full years to open it up.

I say this a lot: I have the best friends anyone could have. I can’t imagine what my life would be without them.

Or without you.