I knew it was going to be bad.
I didn’t think it would be this bad.
Thirty five people entered the Eighth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge (Brought To You By Bocktown). And at the conclusion of the Elite Eight weekend, there are 16 — SIXTEEN — Blutarskys (and if you don’t know what that is, I’ll explain in a moment).
Given the general carnage of the tournament, I knew there would be some downright ugly entries — including mine, after Saturday night’s loss by Ohio State at the hands of Wichita State. But this, this is unprecendented in the history of AUCNFFC.
Before we get to the futility, let’s take a look at how everyone else is doing. There are a bunch of you who picked Louisville to not only make the Final Four, but to win the whole tournament. But in each of those cases, you guys had just one correct Final Four pick — the Cardinals — with the possibility of adding more points only if Looavull advances.
And yeah, it’s looking like the tiebreaker is going to be even more important this year than it was a year ago.
Those who have Louisville winning the tournament; in all cases, you two points for the correct Final Four pick and a possibility of 10 more:
- My Mom
- Aunt Annoyed Angel
I think there’s one other person who would win the whole freakin’ thing, but she’d do it if Syracuse comes out on top. Jenn has the Orangemen beating Ohio State in the final (sigh); she has two points in hand and as many as 10 more to earn if ‘Cuse is the champion.
As we work our way down the standings, it’s worth pointing out that Pghrugbyref is actually our leader at the moment. He correctly picked both Louisville and Syracuse making the Final Four; unfortunately, he also picked Kansas and Ohio State to play in the title game, so he has no more points to earn.
And then we have the handful of people who made one correct Final Four pick — Louisville — but don’t have that team going much further. These folks have two points in hand, with the possibility of earning four more. It ain’t going to be enough to win, but making any correct picks this year should be something to be proud of:
We have one more person in the Two Plus Four Club, but she got there via a different path. RPM has Syracuse going as far as the title game, but not winning the title.
Another group, this one including entries who gained two points for a correct Final Four pick but cannot earn any additional points:
And that brings us to the special group, those of us who — this year, anyway — ride the college basketball short bus.
If you are new to AUCNFFC, you may not be familiar with the term Blutarsky. You are likely familiar with the scene from Animal House, when members of Delta visit Dean Wormer in his office, to discuss the mid-term grades of the fraternity’s members. We all recall what happened when Wormer addresses John Belushi’s character. The words, at this point, are immortal.
Without further ado, the EAUCNFFC Blutarsky award winners:
- Uncle Crappy
- Mrs. Crappy
- DJ Lunchbox
- Grandpa Caldwell
- Kelly (and Evan)
- Zombie Dudders
I would point out that this year’s tournament made it unusually difficult to make correct picks of any kind. I would point that out, but I would just be making excuses for my — our — pathetic performances. Thanks for playing, fellow Blutarskys — I hope we all do better next year.
Toga! Toga! Toga!
Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?