A year ago, I put up the first-ever edition of Ask Uncle Crappy. Because it was Michigan Week, I thought a college football-specific question-and-answer session would be a fun thing to do.

For whatever reason, that post has become the most-viewed post in Uncle Crappy’s history, and it continues to get hits every day.

I don’t know if we can top that, but we’re going to try: Welcome to the second edition of Ask Uncle Crappy: College football edition.

I have a couple questions for you to answer in the comments, and then you can ask me anything — rich1anything — related to college football: trivia, opinion, history. I’ll see what I can do to respond.

Your questions:

1) What was your first football game (we’ll include college or pro here)? Tell me what who was playing, how old you were, where you were, what you remember, how many bratwursts you ate in the parking lot, etc.

2) Which would be better for Rich Rodriguez: A lifetime supply of Pepcid? Or should he go straight to something more potent, like Xanax?

Get your questions and answers in, boys and girls. And thanks for playing.


  1. A1 – I think it was 1978 – 5th grade or so – Windermere classmate up the street (Johnny Miller) family invited me to go with them to a college football game at Miami – I didn’t know what Miami was- most of the way down there I kept hearing his grandmother (who was in the front seat next to grandpa) – talking about ‘Miami’ – and I kept thinking – what is ‘ami’ and why is it hers? (sidenote – I spent way too much time at my college, drunk, looking in the mirror at my shirt / sweat shirt, laughing saying ‘I’m a i’m’ – but that’s not important here) –

    So we finally got down there – carted off to some ‘alumni room for old people’- and waited for this game to start – we walked through some of the campus, and then to the stadium, which, for HP’s reference, is where the old hockey rink was located (next to what was in our day the BSB building ‘biological science building’) – small stadium, not much bigger than Upper Arlington’s –

    Can’t remember much about the game or who they played – think I enjoyed my hot dog – and then we had the 2 hour drive home- think Grandma stopped saying ‘Miami’ by then –

    Got home – rather tired – and mentally wrote off that college – Miami, until later of course.

    A2 – I’ll go with the Ramones on this one ’20 20 20 4 hours ago, . . . .’

    Q – what’s going to happen to the psyche of the UM seniors when they lose this one?


  2. OK, first football game would have been UNC playing someone when I was in kindergarten or first grade. Who knows who we played. I remember the stadium being like a very big high school stadium — one tier with a five row deck or so on top. The story I was told was that the alumni who donated the land for the stadium required it not to be higher than the surrounding trees. Still, my mother was freaked out, because at the time, she was extremely afraid of heights. (Some how this had faded over time.) She was concerned that our seats would be in the deck area and therefore, too high. This is about all I remember of the game — having her talk about how high we were sitting. I don’t even remember how high that was.
    Anyway, the thing I remember being most excited about was seeing the UNC Ram with his Carolina Blue horns walking the sideline. Later, during the school year, my class went to a dairy farm. Cows were OK, but this happened to be the farm that owned the UNC ram and he was there, between sport seasons with flecks of blue paint still on his horns! I was so excited! I said something about it and the farmer said the ram thought he was a dog and that he liked to round up the cows. The farmer whistled to the ram and said, “Get the cows,” and off he went across the field and brought the cows back to the barn. Soooooo cool!

    As for that coach up north, I recommend electro-shock treatments so he can forget the whole 2008 season.


  3. 1. It was sophomore year in high school. Someone let Juan and I use their tickets to an OSU game. I was so stunned and amazed by the crowd, the game…well pretty much everything, that I can’t remember a lot of the details. I don’t remember who we played or if we won. I vaguely remember hanging out with a few people in the parking lot – tailgating? I dunno, it’s foggy.

    I do remember two things:
    a. They were giving out packs of Trident gum at the gates. We must have collected 70 or so packs that day.

    b. It was a televised game and we were sitting next to the student section. A lot of the cheers contained curse words. I think quite a few of those naughty words were televised that day.

    2 My vote is for the xanax, lots of xanax.


  4. oh and this too. Going to that OSU game completely ruined me for any other college football games. I went to two games while at Miami and was definitely underwhelmed.

    Actually, OSU games have ruined me for almost any other football games….Stillers, Browns included.


  5. HP/The Wife: Do you have questions for Uncle Crappy?

    HP: Ohio State games did the same for me when I was at OU. Football in Athens always seemed kinda silly.

    The Wife: I’ve thought Kenan was a gorgeous stadium since I first saw it on our Chapel Hill trip. I’d love to see a game there.

    Kewyson: I think UM’s seniors will mostly just be happy that they’re done.


  6. Well, I hate to brag, but the first college game I ever went to was…OSU in the Rose Bowl, when I was in kindergarden. This was the year that OSU and Michigan tied the Michigan game, and so it wasn’t known at the end of the game which team was going to the Rose bowl to play USC. Well, while my dad was an OSU Law School graduate, his undergrad degree was from USC. So, I think thanks to many many game-time beers, and the thought of OSU playin SC, and the fact that he had just won a big case, he said that if they decide OSU is going, then we were all gonna go too. That descission was made several days later, and as family lore goes, my oldest sister, who was in her senior year of highschool, was the first to hear that OSU was going—she came running down the stairs screaming “we are going to California!” over and over. Dad, now sober, regreted the promise. But, right after Christmas we boarded a chartered plane, and headed to LA. Another memory:all of the adults on the plane were really loud and funny, but at some point the mood got ugly. Believe it or not, the plane ran out of booze somewhere over the Rockies, and there was practicly a mutiny (sp?) up there in the air. I remember a lot about the trip, and the Rose Parade, and the game. We had streamers and we threw them when OSU scored. I was down to my last one, so I would kinda throw it, but hold the
    end, and re-roll it up between scores. OSU won the game, and of course my dad cheered for them and not USC the whole time. It was an awesome family vacation and the begining of my love affair w/OSU football.


  7. UC,

    I went to Morgantown for my college game but I can’t remember who WVU played that day. Several great memories stick in my head from that day over 30 years ago. In no particular order…

    The game was in the old original horseshoe stadium with capacity of about 40,000. The open end, where we sat, had metal bleachers like you see in every high school stadium in America. Cost for a family of four in the bleachers, $10.00. Now you know why we went to WVU.

    We tailgated behind an old glass factory and all around the small parking lot were piles and piles of colorful, broken glass pieces. There wasn’t any cooking with our small family gathering. Mom’s special fried chicken was the main course.

    College football is special for all of the individual traditions and WVU’s revolved around the band and it’s location. They sat in the closed end at the top of the stadium. And, they ran down the aisles and onto the field for the halftime show. I distinctly remember thinking that one slip would result in a multi-person pile up and the show would be over before it started.

    They let the fans onto the artifical turf field after the game. All of the regulars had footballs and small games broke out all over the field.

    One last memory, on the ride home up I77, we were driving across a long expanse of elevated highway when a yellow Cadillac hit the breaks and started to spin on the icy highway. The resulting pile up, the one the band avoided, was six cars. We escaped with a couple of small dents. When questioned on why he hit the breaks for no apparent reason on an icy bridge the driver of the Cadillac informed the police that he was a diplomat from Lebanon and had never driven on an icy road.

    You’ve just gotta love college football!

    Rich Rodriquez needs a full frontal lobotomy! And, here’s the evidence. In an AP wire story in the Cleveland PD today, he said the OSU vs. UM is just another game. When will coaches learn that fans care more about rivalry games than any other game? More importantly, when will AD’s make sure they address this in the interview process? Cut to interview….

    AD: Who’s our archrival?
    Coach: That school up North.
    AD: When do we play them next?
    Coach: 312 days, 14 hours, 27 minutes, 12 seconds from now.
    AD: You’re hired!

    Ok UC, I’ve rambles long enough. Here’s what I want to know…

    What’s your most vivid memory from the long and storied history of OSU vs. UM?


  8. ok, my question.

    I’m sure this has been discussed on ESPN, in the paper and online, but I’m leaving it to you to tell me.

    Three way tie for #1 in the Big Ten this year….
    who needs to win, who needs to lose for OSU to be #1??


  9. Amy: That’s quite a start! And not unlike how we ended up at the 2003 Fiesta Bowl — after we met back at the truck at the end of the ’02 Michigan game, my father announced that he already had flights and hotel rooms for my folks, The Wife and me and my sister and brother in law ready to go. We were fortunate to find three pairs of tix, and off we went to Tempe.

    HP: One of the three teams tied at the top gets a loss on Saturday, because Penn State and Michigan State play each other. If we’re looking for the automatic BCS berth — and the trip to the Rose Bowl — we need Sparty to come up big on Saturday.

    Keep in mind — even with a Penn State win, I think there’s an excellent chance we get a BCS at-large bid anyway. Even with our poor showing the past two seasons, the fact remains — Ohio State travels as well as any team in the country. That means ticket sales, full hotel rooms — lots of money pumped into the local economy in Phoenix, Miami or New Orleans.

    Large: Hooo. I have lots:
    1975: Two fourth-quarter touchdowns to seal a win at Ann Arbor. Watch the grownups go crazy while we watched on TV.
    1979: Blocked punt for a TD seals another win on the road; watched this in a warehouse in Westerville, and remember taking a giant Block O flag outside and waving it to cars driving by on 270.
    2002: Michigan game was a microcosm of the entire season — tight game won by the defense.
    2005: Greatest Michigan-game comeback of my life.
    2006: Game of the century lived up to the hype.
    2007: An ugly-ass game that only a Woody fan could love. And I loved it.

    I have to go with 2002. Great game, high stakes, and we followed through at the Fiesta Bowl.


  10. I posted this response in DC and the computer ate my words. So I’ll be brief. My first football memory is a spring game in the 1970s. Newly divorced Dad was taking us kids to the game for his weekend activity with us. I don’t recall the game at all. When we left, Dad’s car was boxed in on all sides. He was so mad that he punched the top of the car hard enough to leave a dent in the soft top of his Oldsmobile. This has influenced my perception of my Dad’s temper ever since.

    I don’t think good Xanax should be wasted on someone like Rodriguez. Keep him agitated so he can continue to piss off his fans!


Comments are closed.