faucnffc 2.0.

Thad says you should give it a try. AND THERE'S NO WAY THAT'S A FOUL.

As much fun as I had watching Ohio State and OU win their respective conference championships, the real fun is about to begin — it’s time for the Fifth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge.

The regulars know the drill, but I’m hopeful, as always, we’ll have some newcomers to join the fun; with them in mind, let’s take a brief stroll through the instructions, in handy list form:

  1. Find yourself a copy of the bracket. This shouldn’t be hard, but if you’re having trouble — and in deference to our favorite Yahoo employee —  Yahoo has a nice PDF version here.
  2. Pick the four teams — one from each region — you think will win their regional championship and travel to the Final Four in Indianapolis.
  3. After consulting your bracket, pick the two teams you think will win the national semi-final games on April 3.
  4. Of those two two semi-final winners, pick who you think will win the championship game on April 5.
  5. We’ve had some tight finishes in the past so I’m going to modify the scoring a bit this year. A correct Final Four pick gets a point. A correct semi-final pick gets two. A correct pick in the title game gets three. The entry with the highest point total at the end is our winner.

Using this year’s bracket, here’s a completely hypothetical — and highly unlikely — example of what your entry might look like:

Final Four: Lehigh vs. Vermont/East Tennessee St. vs. Robert Morris
Championship: Vermont vs. Robert Morris
Champion: Robert Morris

As always, you’re encouraged to supplement your picks with whatever
explanations or smack you feel like tacking on (examples are here). Get your picks to me by noon Thursday — when the first-round games begin — via email, comment or smoke signal, and I’ll have them all posted here Thursday afternoon for everyone to see.

The best parts? It’s free! And we’re competing for Fabulous Prizes,* hand-selected by Uncle Crappy!

And so we’re all clear on one thing — Juan, oh he of very little basketball knowledge or interest, will be entered against his will for the fourth year in a row. If we can find the picks of Phil’s Mom, we’ll use those; if not, we’ll use the penny-flipping method that earned Juan exactly zero points a year ago.

And if you don’t know about Phil’s Mom, here’s my standard explanation:

Now — what’s with this Phil’s Mom thing? Uncle Crappy’s infatuation with Monday Night Football color guy and occasional radio host Tony Kornheiser is well-documented, and the mother of Phil “The Showkiller” Ceppaglia, who served as the producer for Kornheiser’s radio show when it was on ESPN, has been a fixture during tournament time for several years. She’s usually relied upon to provide a little comic relief, because she knows absolutely nothing about basketball, but a few years ago, Phil’s Mom shocked the world by picking George Mason to win it all. GM nearly did, making it to the Final Four and making Phil’s Mom a folk hero.

If you have other questions, please feel free to get in touch. If not, get your entries to me by noon Thursday, and we’ll get the fun underway.

*Prizes not actually fabulous. Unless Uncle Crappy wins his own contest.

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faucnffc: championship edition.

carolina

Two people get congratulations on last night’s win by the North Carolina Tar Heels — Mrs. Crappy, our favorite Tar Heel, and Kewyson, the winner of the Fourth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge.

Kewyson won by virtue of having a one-point lead on Mystery Michelle and Carolina Boy and a two-point lead over Carla, all of whom also picked UNC to win the tournament. As I said a couple days ago, BurghBaby was the only other contestant who had a chance of catching Kewyson, and she needed a Michigan State victory to pull that off — and it was apparent about five minutes in that that wasn’t going to be likely.

This also means I need to come up with an alternate prize for Kewyson; given that he’s seen plenty of pictures of me taken when we were in high school — not to mention spending a fair amount of time at our always-well-supervised-and-never-EVER-doing-bad-things-on-a-school-night A Team parties — the novelty of receiving one of my long-lost senior pictures probably doesn’t have much appeal for him. If anyone has any suggestions, I’d be happy to hear them.

Thanks to everyone who played in this year’s AUCNFFC. I hope I can count on seeing you back here again next year.

(And if you wanted to hang around between now and then, that would be cool, too. I understand I can be pretty entertaining during football season.)

– – –

And because I know there’s a whole bunch of you *coughfredahem* who are curious: Mrs. Crappy was technically awake when the clocks hit zeroes last night. This was an improvement over UNC’s 2005 championship, when an early work schedule forced her to bed by halftime.

Was she jumping around, yelling and celebrating her team’s most recent title?

Look — I said she was awake. I didn’t say she was watching. I had to do that for her.

faucnffc: down to the wire.

We’re down to the final game of the NCAA men’s basketball tournament and, for the purposes of the Fourth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge, we’re down to two contestants who can win it all.

There are a bunch of you — four, specifically — who picked North Carolina as your eventual champion, but just one of you, Kewyson, had a pretty good head start heading into the weekend by picking three of his Final Four correctly. He holds four points going into Monday night’s game, and a win by the Tar Heels would give him seven, an insurmountable lead over Mystery Michelle and Carolina Boy, who would each end up with six, and Carla, who would end up with five.

And although her native North Dakota isn’t exactly Big Ten country, BurghBaby did me proud — she’s the only one of us who picked Michigan State to win it all. If Sparty comes through, BB will leapfrog everyone else to take our title.

doug

What will Kewyson or BB win? I’m not saying the prizes will necessarily be the same, but just a day ago, Father Spoon received his Fabulous Prizes* for winning last year’s THAUCNFFC — an impressive trophy and an autographed picture of Uncle Crappy, circa 1984 and all the associated feathery-haired goodness. Kewyson already has one of the those pics — he would have received his something like 24 years ago — so I might have to come up with something else for him if Carolina wins tomorrow night.

But. BB? If you win? I guarantee one of those pictures will be yours.

*Prizes not actually fabulous.

points well taken.

basketball-photo-21A week ago, I was impressed with the participants in the Fourth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge — we were doing so well that I had visions of a massive pile of winners after the championship game, which is why I was begging for tie-breakers back then.

Since then? Teh suck has returned.

That’s not quite true. Most of us went with favorites, and most of us got burned when Pitt and Louisville departed early. I got the double whammy; Pitt screwed me up on one side of my bracket, and Memphis, my hunch pick to win the national title, was crushed by Missouri on the other.

The upside? We have a couple clear front-runners and a decent number of others who still have points to earn. Yer standings, along with a few notes:

1. My sister/Kewyson. Both have three points, and both have their title games and champions still in the tournament. As a reminder: both have a UConn/UNC final; E picked UConn and K picked Carolina to win it all.

2. Mystery Michelle/Carolina Boy. Two points each; title game and champ still available.

3. BurghBaby. Two points; champion is still playing.

4. Spoon/Yours Truly. We both still have points available, but our champions are out. Not much more to see here. Move along.

5. Ethel. Two points. Nowhere else to go.

6. Large/Carla. One point each, but their champions are still alive.

7. Adam/Gina and her dog. One point apiece, with a possibility for more.

8. Mrs. Crappy/Annoyed Angel/Papuga/Jack/Michael/Dahcheet/Fred/Nicole. One point. No more coming.

9. HP/Lokay/Mr. Burns/Juan. MISTER Blutarsky: Zero. Point. Zero.

I have NOT taken the time to figure out the possibilities for our front-runners; I am A) lazy and B) willing to be surprised. But there is a decent chance that we’ll know after Saturday’s semi-final games who will win the FAUCNFFC — and all its associated fabulous prizes.*

Good luck to all of yinz who still got a shot.

*Prizes not actually fabulous.

faucnffc.

Ohio State couldn’t complete its run through the Big Ten tournament, but no matter — they’re ready to start the Big Dance, and that means it’s time for the Fourth Annual Uncle Crappy NCAA Final Four Challenge.

The regulars know the drill, but I’m hopeful, as always, we’ll have some newcomers to join the fun; with them in mind, let’s take a brief stroll through the instructions, in handy list form:

  1. Find yourself a copy of the bracket. This shouldn’t be hard, but if you’re having trouble, CBS has a nice version here.
  2. Pick the four teams — one from each region — you think will win their regional championship and travel to the Final Four in Detroit.
  3. After consulting your bracket, pick the two teams you think will win the national semi-final games on April 4.
  4. Of those two two semi-final winners, pick who you think will win the championship game on April 6.
  5. Each correct pick gets a point; a correct pick in the title game gets three. The entry with the highest point total at the end is our winner.

Using this year’s bracket, here’s a completely hypothetical — and highly unlikely — example of what your entry might look like:

Final Four: Robert Morris vs. Cornell/Morgan St. vs. Binghamton
Championship: Cornell vs. Binghamton
Champion: Binghamton

As always, you’re encouraged to supplement your picks with whatever
explanations or smack you feel like tacking on. Get your picks to me by noon Thursday — when the first-round games begin — via email, comment or smoke signal, and I’ll have them all posted here Thursday afternoon for everyone to see.

The best parts? It’s free! And we’re competing for Fabulous Prizes,* hand-selected by Uncle Crappy!

And so we’re all clear on one thing — Juan, oh he of very little basketball knowledge or interest, will be entered against his will for the third year in a row, using the picks of Phil’s Mom (assuming we can find the picks of Phil’s Mom). If you don’t know about Phil’s Mom, here’s my standard explanation:

Now — what’s with this Phil’s Mom thing? Uncle Crappy’s infatuation with Monday Night Football color guy and occasional radio host Tony Kornheiser is well-documented, and the mother of Phil “The Showkiller” Ceppaglia, who served as the producer for Kornheiser’s radio show when it was on ESPN, has been a fixture during tournament time for several years. She’s usually relied upon to provide a little comic relief, because she knows absolutely nothing about basketball, but a few years ago, Phil’s Mom shocked the world by picking George Mason to win it all. GM nearly did, making it to the Final Four and making Phil’s Mom a folk hero.

If you have other questions, please feel free to get in touch. If not, get your entries to me by noon Thursday, and we’ll get the fun underway.

*Prizes not actually fabulous. Unless Uncle Crappy wins his own contest.